


Meet The Dodsons

by darklioness82



Category: Scott & Bailey
Genre: F/F, Family, Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-19
Updated: 2013-10-19
Packaged: 2017-12-29 19:40:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1009264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darklioness82/pseuds/darklioness82
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Let me introduce you to Julie's family, only she's not overly happy at the prospect of spending a few days with them so Gill offers to help keep her sane and go along with her, much to Julie's mother's delight. Be prepared for the usual Gill/Julie banter, assumptions, revelations and family dynamics.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author’s Note:** I wanted to write something that was a little more Julie-centric, especially as we know next to nothing about her, so I feel that her background is pretty much fair game at this point in time.

 

 

Julie walked through her front door, locked it behind her and hung her leather jacket up on the peg in the hallway. She made her way into the living room where she threw her bag down on the settee and depressed the ‘standby’ button on her stereo. As something calm and melodic filtered through the speakers she went into the kitchen, pulled out a tumbler and filled it with a generous measure of scotch whiskey. She took a healthy sip of the caramel coloured liquid, sloshed it around her mouth so that it hit the back of her throat and gulped it down. She felt that beautiful burn of bitterness and let out a breath in pleasure. It was just what she needed after the day she’d just had at work. She felt her phone vibrate in the pocket of her trousers and carried the rest of her drink back through to the living room before looking at her phone.

 

“ _Jules, call me when you have a moment. Nothing urgent, just want to catch up. Love you, Mum xxx_ ”

 

Julie cursed whichever of her nieces or nephews had taught their Gran to text and then sighed deeply. She knew that she was lousy at keeping in touch with her mother but she was rarely available at a reasonable hour to call anyway. She didn’t get involved with family stuff much at the best of times. Although, now that the kids were young adults themselves it was much easier to chat to them on a level she was comfortable with. Her brother’s boys had cousins on his wife’s side of the family so they were naturally closer to them but her sister’s children didn’t have anyone else apart from them and herself. For some odd reason, despite her distance over the years, they seemed to hold her in particular regard. She’d received sporadic letters and packages in the post full of childish drawings and pleas of visits from when they were small. Now she was sent emails with photo attachments and Facebook requests despite not having an account. It’s not that she didn’t want to get involved, it’s just that she barely had time for herself and she was sure they had a skewed perception of the sort of person she was and the sort of job she did. Julie checked her watch and noted that it was ten thirty, if her mother had just texted then she was still up so she thought that she should get the phone call over and done with. Who knew when she was likely to get another chance? She took another large sip of her drink, shrugged off her blazer, kicked off her heels and picked up her landline telephone. Julie dialled her mother’s number as she sat down on the sofa, moved her bag onto the floor and made herself comfortable.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Hi Mum.”

 

“Jules! How are you my love?”

 

“I’m fine, just got in from work.”

 

“At this hour?”

 

“Yes Mum, this is pretty normal for me nowadays.” Actually anything before midnight was reasonably early thought Julie, if you went by the last couple of months that was.

 

“Are you getting enough sleep and are you eating properly? You always were far too skinny for my liking.” Julie chuckled, it didn’t matter how old she was her mother still liked to fuss.

 

“Yes and yes. What about you, looking after that dicky ticker of yours?” Julie’s mum had had a mild heart attack nearly a year ago and it had made everyone realise that she wasn’t going to be around forever, despite her stubbornness and forceful personality.

 

“Of course, I’m still enjoying my delightful cocktail of tablets each day.” If anyone wondered where Julie had got her sarcasm from they didn’t have to look very far if her mother was anything to go by.

 

“That’s good to hear. How are you anyway? Anything new happening that I should be aware of?”

 

“Claire’s got yet another new boyfriend, one of those ‘goth’ types, you know with all the piercings, tattoos and wears nothing but black? You probably don’t remember the last one. Nice boy he was, very polite and he made such a lovely cuppa.” Julie chuckled out loud over the phone. That was so very typical of her mother, as long as a person could make a decent cup of tea they were marriage material in her book. Julie daren’t tell her about her own numerous body modifications, thankfully most of which were in places that she could cover quite easily, she’d had to for work anyway.

 

“Lucy passed her theory test a few weeks back and she’s been having proper lessons after college on a Thursday. Caroline was taking her out in her car before that. She’s not bad, drives a little too fast but she’s young and she’ll learn. Oh and get this, Anthony’s got an interview with the police next week. Have you been talking to him behind Caroline’s back by any chance?” Julie knew that her sister wouldn’t have been overly enamoured by that piece of news. Caroline still thought that Julie carried a gun and wrestled with violent thugs on a daily basis. She’d had firearms training of course but she’d fortunately never had to put it into practice. It was just as well really, the mere thought of firing a gun scared her half to death.

 

“Of course I haven’t! It’s the first I’ve heard about it. Although I am surprised he didn’t speak to me first, I wonder why?”

 

“Well, when you come to see us you can ask him yourself. Now when exactly will that be, hmm?” Julie’s mum was rarely subtle at the best of times.

 

“I don’t know Mum, you know I’ve been really busy since my promotion.” Wasn’t that the truth and then some! There were weeks she’d barely been in her own office for all the travelling around the Greater Manchester area she had been doing.

 

“Surely you’re still allowed time off from time to time? Or have you been spending it with someone in particular lately?” Julie rolled her eyes, she knew it wouldn’t have been long before her mother started to go down that particular line of questioning.

 

“And when would I have had the time? Yes, I do get time off but it just hasn’t been possible lately and I have other things to do, I have a house to maintain and friends to see.”

 

“And we’re not worthy of a visit now and then?” Julie refused to feel guilty, her mother had her own social life with the local WI and often had the grandchildren round at various intervals, she was hardly alone and neglected.

 

“You know that’s not what I meant. I’ll see what I can arrange.”

 

“Soon?”

 

“Yeah, we’ll see.”

 

“How’s Gill?”

 

“She’s fine, as far as I know.”

 

“You haven’t seen her recently?”

 

“Three or four weeks ago maybe. She’s just as busy as I am plus she’s got Sammy to consider. He’s just got engaged by the way and he’s going to be joining the force. Actually thinking about it, I wonder if Anthony’s been speaking to him? I know they’re friends on Facebook and they always did get along well with each other.”

 

“Makes sense, when you do see Gill next you’ll have to ask her. Please give her my love and pass on my congratulations. It’s been ages since I last saw her.”

 

“I’d forgotten that you’ve practically adopted her!”

 

“She’s such a good influence on you, better than some of your other friends in the past. I’ll even bet that she visits her mother more often than you do?” Julie wondered just what it was with Gill and being adored by her friends mothers. Janet’s mum Dorothy seemed to share a similar view.

 

“Her mother lives in the same county, so she can be there and back in a day. I promise that I’ll look into when I can get up to see you, soon, okay?”

 

“Good, that’s all I ask love. The kids will be happy to see you.”

 

“I’m sure they’re old enough to have lives of their own by now.”

 

“You know that’s not true, they adore you. They’d just like to see you more often, as would I.”

 

“Okay, okay, I get it. I’m going to go now, I need to have something to eat, unwind and then go to bed.”

 

“Alright love, I’ll speak to you soon unless I see you before?”

 

“Night Mum.”

 

“Night Jules.”

 

* * *

 

Gill walked into the pub about ten minutes later than they’d agreed and found Julie sitting at a table with a bottle and two glasses beside her. Gill wondered if her best friend could actually read her mind or if she was just predictable.

 

“Hello love.” Julie got up from her seat to kiss Gill on the cheek and offered to take her coat and bag so she could put it on the seat next to her along with her own.

 

“Hiya Slap! Funny thing; I got a text from your mother this afternoon, inviting me to stay for a weekend?” Gill asked her best friend and wondered if Iris knew they were meeting later that day for a catch up or was she just as psychic as her daughter? “While it’s lovely to hear from her, I wondered if you knew about it and if there was any particular reason for the invite?” Julie sighed in frustration, it was one thing pestering her to visit but another when her mother started to harass her friend. Gill parked herself opposite Julie as the older woman poured out a generous glass of wine for her.

 

“I’m so sorry about that, she’s been after me to see her for a few weeks now. She asked after you the last time I spoke to her and I suppose she thought it would be a clever way of ensuring I go up there.” Gill chuckled good naturedly.

 

“You really don’t do family gatherings do you?” They both reached for their glasses and took a well needed sip of the cold alcoholic beverage.

 

“Not if I can help it. I know what will happen, it will be fine at first and then once we’re all caught up the arguments will start and stuff long since passed will be dredged up. Not my idea of fun.”

 

“No, but when was the last time you did go and see her?” Gill asked in a tone that suggested she was about to admonish her friend.

 

“About six months ago, why?”

 

“Don’t you think you ought to make the effort? Especially after her health scare last year.”

 

“You’re right of course, I just keep finding excuses to put it off.” Julie took another sip of her wine, the bottle wasn’t going to last long at this rate.

 

“Tell you what, why don’t I come with you? I haven’t seen Iris for ages and I’d enjoy seeing you outside of your comfort zone.” Gill smirked at Julie from across the table as she teased her.

 

“Cheers mate! You don’t have to, honestly. I will go and see her soon. Besides, she knows you have your own family and that you’re just as much of a workaholic as me.” It sounded as though Julie was desperately trying to put Gill off the idea.

 

“Are you ashamed of me?” Gill pouted in mock indignation and Julie laughed out loud.

 

“Of course not! You’d really put yourself through that, willingly?”

 

“Anything for you Slap. I’m not saying that there won’t be a payback at some point in the future though. You’ll have duties at Sammy’s wedding, I can promise you that.” Whatever Gill asked of her could never be too much of an imposition, especially if it was for Sammy but they enjoyed teasing each other like this anyway.

 

“Well, hopefully that won’t be for a few years yet by which time you’ll have forgotten so I can live with that.”

 

“Believe me, I won’t have done. I’ve already got half a list prepared.” And Julie could well believe that she had. Gill was a little too excited about her son’s engagement, even with the thought at the back of her mind that they were far too young.

 

“Alright, but if we do this then we’re not staying at Mum’s, we’ll get a hotel room for the weekend. At least then we’ll be able to escape the mad house for a few hours.”

 

“Sounds good to me, I could do with a break.” Gill took another sip of her wine, already ready feeling energised at the prospect of a few days away with Julie.

 

“I can’t guarantee it will be a relaxing one though. When are you free?”

 

“How about the end of the month? Would that fit into your family’s plans?”

 

“I’ll call Mum tonight and find out. Oh god, you know that’s she’s going to be delighted that you’re coming? I won’t hear the end of it!


	2. Chapter 2

 

Iris opened the front door before Julie had even killed the engine of her car and practically bounced on the balls of her feet in anticipation of seeing her daughter. Of her three children, Julie was the one most like her father and there was something quite reassuring about that. He’d been a wonderful man, kind and thoughtful as well as intelligent and witty, a man very much ahead of his time given the generation they’d been brought up in. Julie had been blessed with his height and build as well as his traits. As much as he had been a family man he had also been proud of his career in the RAF and often enjoyed extended periods of time alone.

 

Iris watched as Julie climbed out of her car and was joined by Gill a few seconds later. Iris adored Gill; the younger woman was on the same kind of wavelength as Julie, seemed to understand her little foibles and unique brand of humour as well as being equal in a professional capacity. It was no secret that Julie’s work was her life and she needed someone who also understood that. Gill was sensible and professional as well as kind and generous like Julie. She she was also a wonderful mother to young Sammy. Iris gave the girls a little wave as they descended the steps to the front door. She immediately reached for Gill, kissed her on the cheek and wrapped her arms around her by way of greeting while Julie stood there, arms folded in front of her with a look of mock indignation on her face.

 

“My Darling!” Iris exclaimed as she finally loosened her grip on Gill and allowed her to breathe. Iris held her at arms length as she scanned her with her eyes just to make sure that she was fit, healthy and unmarked by anything untoward. Gill seemed uncharacteristically embarrassed by the overzealous greeting and fought down a blush.

 

“None taken.” Julie muttered aloud sarcastically but grinned as soon as she’d said it. She knew her mother had a soft spot for her best friend, although she’d never been able to fathom why.

 

“Come here Jules!” Iris let Gill go and proceeded to squeeze the life out of her daughter in gratitude of her visit. She kissed both her cheeks and then shepherded them both into the house. “I’ll get a pot of tea on the go and then we can catch up. Caroline’s already here and the kids will be popping round for their tea later.” Julie and Gill made their way through the house to the living room, closely followed by Iris.

 

Julie’s younger sister Caroline was halfway between Julie and Gill in height and much curvier than either of them. She had dirty blonde hair just like her sister but it fell in messy waves halfway down her back. She’d been a housewife and mother for most of her adult life but now had a part time job as a receptionist in the local GP’s surgery. Her husband Marc was an ordinary bloke; he worked in IT for a large employer so he was a little bit clever but had no real ambition so only ever progressed to middle management and appeared to be comfortable there. He played football in a local team with his mates on a Saturday morning, went for the occasional pint on a Friday after work and took pleasure in providing for his family. Fortunately he wasn’t one of those men where the testosterone took over and he had never felt the need to ‘prove’ himself in an overtly macho way. He and Caroline seemed to have an unremarkable relationship, both shared parenting responsibilities and household chores now that Caroline had gone back to work and they did make the effort to spend time with each other both as a couple and as a family unit while they still could.

 

Julie personally felt that her sister’s lifestyle was the epitome of boring and conventional and it wouldn’t have suited herself in the slightest. Caroline had left school with very few qualifications but she wasn’t unintelligent and Julie hadn’t been able to understand her satisfaction at staying at home with her children. Then again, Julie hadn’t been overly fussed about having children so she didn’t really expect to understand the appeal.

 

“Hello Julie.” Caroline greeted her sister from the comfort of her seat on the armchair but made no move to offer her a hug or a peck on the cheek. Although they did love each other, there had always been some distance between them, a clash of personalities and lack of common interests was probably to blame.

 

“Caroline. You remember Gill don’t you?”

 

“Yes, nice to see you again.” Caroline did get up then, she was nothing if not polite, and stuck her hand out to shake Gill’s. It was formal but then again they’d only met a couple of times before.

 

“Likewise.” Gill responded as she shook Caroline’s hand. Iris grinned in the background, it was lovely to have her daughters in the same room together for a change. Unfortunately her son Andrew and his family had been unable to make it this weekend but he and Julie seemed to keep in touch outside of big family gatherings anyway. They had always been a bit closer to each other and had a bit more of a natural sibling relationship. They had similar personalities and outlooks on life and the world around them. Iris was sure that Andrew was what Julie would have been like had she chosen to have had a family of her own, a softer, less serious version. People had often thought that Julie had been Andrew’s brother when they were very small, before it had become apparent that she was most definitely female. Julie had always been a tomboy, her lanky frame hadn’t helped matters, and she’d taken great pride in confusing people while she had been able to. She’d been such a feisty child, always rallying against something or other, and being equal to the boys had never been good enough, she’d always wanted to be better than them.

 

“Go on, sit down and make yourselves comfortable.” Iris instructed her guests and went to put the kettle on. Julie and Gill took up seats next to each other on the sofa as Iris prepared herself for a long catch up before her grandchildren descended upon them.

 

* * *

 

Iris wouldn’t hear of Julie and Gill’s offers to help with dinner but instead dragged Caroline out into the kitchen with her and left the girls to keep themselves amused in the living room for a while.

 

“So, what do you think?” Iris impatiently asked her younger daughter as she started to gather the vegetables together.

 

“About what?”

 

“Our Jules and Gill.” Iris said it as though Caroline should already have known what she was going to ask.

 

“You’re not _still_ going on about that are you?” It was clearly a subject mother and daughter had spoken about before.

 

“Well, it makes sense, they do seem awfully close.” Especially if you had been looking for it, which Iris had been from the moment they had arrived.

 

“They’re friends, best friends, and have been for a long time. Of course they’re close. Besides, I’m sure if Julie had something to tell you she would have done it by now.” Caroline wasn’t particularly interested anyway. It wasn’t that she didn’t care but she didn’t feel it was really any of her business, they were fully grown adults with lives of their own which were quite different from each other.

 

“I doubt it, she’s always been cagey about her love life. You know, she’s never actually told me that she’s gay?” When Julie was in her late teens and early twenties it hadn’t been a subject Iris was comfortable discussing or even thinking about. As time and attitudes moved on it was something she had been used to hearing on the news, in television programs and even some of her friends had begun to open up about their respective gay children. When it was clear that Julie was never going to have a family of her own, Iris had quietly acknowledged to herself and accepted that what she had long since suspected about her daughter was in all likelihood true. It was just such a shame that neither of them had been able to broach the subject in all these years.

 

“Have you considered that she might not be? Just because she lives alone and has chosen not to have a family doesn’t mean anything. Perhaps she just isn’t interested in _anyone_ like that?” Julie had certainly never mentioned anyone to her, even when they had been younger and still living at home.

 

“Oh I know. Why would they choose to stay at at hotel this weekend instead of here with me?” Iris had long since suspected there was more to Julie and Gill’s relationship than simple friendship.

 

“Perhaps they just want a bit of time and space for themselves and not be cooped up in this house for the entire weekend? Besides, even if Julie is that way inclined, Gill was married until a few years ago wasn’t she? And she’s got a son. She wouldn’t be interested in our Jules like that.”

 

“I suppose you’re right.” Iris sighed and went back to sorting out the vegetables for dinner.

 

“You sound disappointed?” Caroline pulled out a chopping board and a knife and took a couple of carrots from her mum’s pile.

“I worry about her Caroline, it must be such a lonely life. I just want to see her happy and settled.”

 

“She loves her job and seems to be doing very well for herself. She has her house and other friends besides Gill. She looks well doesn’t she? I’m sure she’s perfectly fine as she is Mum.”

 

Gill had been on her way to the bathroom when she overheard her name being mention by Iris. It hadn’t been her intention to eavesdrop, but she hadn’t been able to resist, especially once she’d clued into what she and Caroline had been talking about. It hadn’t been the first time she and Julie had been mistaken for a couple. They’d been on holiday together numerous times and had shared a room because it was easier, cheaper and much more fun that way. She couldn’t help it if other people assumed to know something about the two of them that wasn’t true. Neither of them particularly cared anyway. However, Gill had found it striking that Iris knew very little about her own daughter and was actually quite worried for her. She knew that Julie liked her privacy, craved it in fact, but sometimes Gill wondered if she closed herself off from people to deliberately avoid getting close to them. She appeared to be the only exception for one reason or another.

 

Gill returned to the living room to find Julie outside the patio doors having a cigarette. Neither of them smoked often, usually only in times of stress or simply because they fancied it. Gill joined her outside and Julie offered her the packet. Gill took a cigarette out of the box and Julie lit it for her.

 

“Getting a bit too much in there?” Gill enquired gently. Julie blew out a plume of smoke from the corner of her mouth.

 

“A bit. It’s more difficult with Caroline, we don’t really have much to talk about. It’s a shame Andrew couldn’t make it, he’d have balanced things out.” Gill inhaled on her cigarette as she thought about how to tell Julie what she had overheard on her way to the loo. Gill exhaled and looked at her best friend closely.

 

“Julie…?”

 

“Mmm?” Gill opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by the doorbell. “That’ll be the kids. I should go and let them in, you stay out here and finish your fag.” Julie threw what was left of hers on the patio and stubbed it out with her toe before heading back inside. Gill sighed and thought that perhaps that conversation was better left until they were alone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: chapters three and four were originally one long chapter but I felt it was too much to read all in one go.

 

"You're going to have to tell your mum that we're not a couple." Gill suggested to her friend as she got her toothbrush and tube of toothpaste out of her weekend bag in order to complete her bedtime routine.

 

“What?!” Julie sounded surprised at Gill’s inference. She was already in bed with a book having had her shower first and was just on the right side of sleepy to think about putting the book to one side and closing her eyes.

 

“You mean you didn’t know that’s what she thought?” Gill stopped what she was doing and caught Julie’s eye.

 

“No, not at all. Where on earth would she get that idea from?” Julie put her book down on the bedside table sensing that this was going to turn into a bit of a discussion, especially now that she felt quite awake. Gill spluttered in surprise, for a senior detective Julie could be quite naive about some things.

 

“Jules, we get it all the time! Even checking in this afternoon the girl on the front desk questioned if a twin room was what we really wanted.” Gill had made the booking so she had been the one to check in. To her credit, the young girl hadn’t seemed embarrassed or flustered, she was extraordinarily polite in fact. It was Gill who had been more surprised and hadn’t known what to say or where to look.

 

“Did she?”

 

“I’m fairly sure that was the suggestion. And look at when we’ve been on holiday, people constantly ask how long we’ve been together and we have to keep saying that we’re just friends.” Julie had never seemed particularly perturbed by the curiosity of others and she’d never made a fuss over it. Of course Gill wasn’t bothered either but it did happen quite frequently. She supposed that Julie had developed a teflon-like shell to other people’s opinions of her over the years, especially in her job. She had the kind of work persona that you either loved or hated. Even though there were a fair few in the ‘dislike’ camp, day to day it rolled off her quite easily.

 

“I know that but my mother?!” Gill plonked herself on the edge of her bed nearest to Julie with the toothbrush and tube of toothpaste still in her hand.

 

“Look at it from her point of view; she knows next to nothing about your personal life, you work too hard and live alone. The only person she sees connected to you outside of the family is me.” Gill had assumed that had been the thought process behind Iris’s misunderstanding anyway.

 

“But why would she even want it to be true? No offence.” Julie had always been under the distinct impression that if she were to tell her mother the truth about her sexuality it wouldn’t have gone down too well.

 

“You don’t think I’m a suitable daughter-in-law? Am I not good enough for you?” Gill knew that Julie hadn’t meant her statement like that but there was a small part of her that was the tiniest bit hurt at the implication she wasn’t the sort of person Julie would be proud to be linked with romantically.

 

“Gill…” Julie’s tone was serious, it had been a long drive up here and then a long afternoon catching up and then playing board games with her nieces and the other adults in the evening. Her nephew Antony had to work a late shift at the pub he had a part time job in but he was going to spend the following afternoon with her on his own instead. She was tired and could do without the deep and meaningful at that moment. Gill sighed and repeated what she’d overheard Iris telling Caroline.

 

“She’s your mum and she wants to see you happy and settled.” Julie looked quite indignant at the suggestion she wasn’t.

 

“I am.”

 

“Are you?” Gill understood her best friend better than Julie thought she did and knew that deep down she wasn’t happy being single.

 

“Now’s not the time for that discussion. Anyway, I’m not going to conform to her idea of what that means just to make her happy.”

 

“No, but…” Gill broke off as she suddenly thought of something.

 

“What are you thinking?” Julie was always suspicious of Gill’s bright ideas, it tended to get them into lots of trouble, although most of the time it was the fun sort.

 

“Actually, I just wondered…where’s the harm in letting her think that we are a couple? Nothing outrageous, just not correcting her if she does say something and perhaps we could be a little more tactile with each other around her? She’d be happier when you leave this weekend knowing that you’re okay. Or at least her version of okay.”

 

“But it’s not true!”

 

“Alright, don’t get so upset about it, it was only a suggestion.” Gill went off to finally clean her teeth. Something about their conversation left her feeling a little unsettled but Gill couldn’t quite put her finger on why. When she came back into the bedroom Julie was laying on her side facing her with her head propped up on her hand.

 

“Okay, let’s do it. It will keep her off my back for a while at least. Nothing overt though, it would be wrong to deliberately mislead her.”

 

“Of course. I’m sure she’d really appreciate the peace of mind.”

 

* * *

 

“Auntie Jules!” Anthony greeted his aunt with a great big bear hug. He didn’t care that he was nineteen years old. He adored her and desperately wished that she lived closer or at least visited more often but he understood perfectly well that her job was fairly intense and that she was a very busy person. He’d often written to her when he was much younger; childish scribbles of thanks when he’d received money for his birthday and the request of a visit soon, if she could find the time. As he’d grown older that had turned into emails updating her with his latest exam results and what he’d been up to with his friends. His two sisters also wrote to her but he was the one who did it most frequently and without prompting.

 

“Hiya love.” Julie returned the hug just as enthusiastically and marvelled at just how tall her nephew had grown. He was about an inch or so taller than her now and she couldn’t help but gush to Gill about how tiny he’d been when he was a baby. She remembered the first time she’d held him with a lack of confidence and a nervous tremor that ran through her entire body. He hadn’t seemed particularly bothered though and remained lightly dozing in her arms for the whole time she held him. The next time hadn’t been quite so sweet or lovely and he’d screamed his little lungs off on sight of her. Her sister had reassured her not to take it personally but Julie had been put off for several weeks after that incident. Once he’d been a bit more user-friendly and giggled more often than he cried, Julie had found that she enjoyed making silly faces and noises just to get those precious little smiles out of him and they’d been as thick as thieves ever since. Her nieces were just as lovely but Anthony had something extra special about him and it wasn’t simply because he had been the first.

 

“Hi Gill.” Anthony greeted his aunt’s best friend and she gave him a hug and a peck on the cheek too. They hadn’t meet often but he and Sammy were friends on facebook and she’d passed a wave or two in his direction over skype occasionally.

 

“You alright cock?” Anthony nodded and looked around for Iris.

 

“Where’s Gran?”

 

“She’s in the kitchen cleaning up after lunch. Have you eaten?” Gill smiled internally at Julie’s mothering tone, she’d caught her doing it to Sammy a few times and oddly enough he actually appeared to listen when it came from Julie and not herself!

 

“Yeah, I’m good.” Despite appearances to the contrary, Anthony could and did eat like a horse when he put his mind to it.

 

“I’ll just go and see if she needs a hand.” Gill made her excuse to leave so Julie and Anthony could catch up on their own.

 

"Fancy a kick around outside?" Julie suggested to her nephew with the aim of getting them out of her mother's earshot and hopefully give them a chance to talk properly.

 

"Yeah alright." The youngster took a set of keys from the bowl in the hallway and led the way through the living room to the garden via the patio doors. There was a shed in the top right hand corner of Iris's garden, stuffed full of toys that the kids no longer played with. Anthony unlocked the padlock and scrabbled around until he found the football, which he promptly handed to Julie. He went back in to search for the pump as the ball was fairly flat and quickly came out with it in his hand. Julie held the ball steady as Anthony pumped it up and took off with it round the garden as soon as he was done. She proceeded to demonstrate a whole series of tricks and balancing skills as Anthony watched his crazy aunt with a wide grin on his face.

 

"You’re such a show off!" He chided her and Julie chuckled, she knew full well that she was showing off. She may not have played with the Manchester Metropolitan Police Veteran's team for a couple of years but she certainly hadn't lost any of her skill or fitness.

 

"Come on then, take it off me!" They chased each other round the garden, tackling each other and scoring pretend goals from between flower pots and washing lines. Julie felt free and easy running around in trainers and jeans, little splashes of mud creeping up her legs, arms and knees and feeling like a kid again, if only for a while. After they had run around enough to be slightly out of breath, Julie felt it was time to address the subject of his chosen career path.

 

“So, Gran tells me that you’ve applied to join the force?” Anthony’s face fell and he shuffled the ball from foot to foot, not quite able to meet his aunt’s eye for fear of her reaction.

 

“Yeah, sorry.” It was so desperately apologetic and Julie was baffled by the response.

 

“What are you sorry for?”

 

“Because it’s dangerous and long hours with not particularly good pay and conditions. And I know I could be a scientist or a lawyer or something prestigious and earn loads of money with the grades I got at A-Level.” It sounded as though he was quoting her sister’s opinion almost word for word.

 

“When you put it like that it doesn’t sound too appealing. So why _do_ you to become a police officer?”

 

“Because I want to help people, especially when they’re at their most vulnerable. I want to bring those people to justice for their crimes so they can’t hurt anyone else ever again. I want to help protect the lives of my friends and family, make them feel safe and know what to do when they’re not.” Julie took in her nephew’s impassioned speech and smiled brightly.

 

“I wish some of my officers carried around that kind of enthusiasm! The thing is, it’s not just a job, it’s a vocation, a way of life. All those reasons you just told me are why we do what we do. Unfortunately not everyone can understand that and they only see the downsides. I have no doubt that you have what it takes sweetheart. I’m very proud of you.” Anthony had tears in his eyes and stretched out his arms for a hug.

 

“Thank you Auntie Jules, thank you so much!” He felt so much more confident now that he had his aunt’s endorsement.

 

“Why didn’t you talk to me about this before?”

 

“I wanted to prove that it was my decision, mine alone, and that I could do it without any help or influence. I was scared that you’d be disappointed like Mum.”

 

“Your mum just worries like all mum’s do.”

 

“Yeah, she does. I’m really proud that you’re my aunt you know. I just hope that I can be as good as you if I get accepted.” Julie grabbed him around the shoulders instead of wrapping in him yet another hug.

 

“If you knew half the things…I’ll tell you one day, once you’ve done your training and passed your exams. I expect to be kept informed of your progress from now on. Remember I have friends in high places so I can find out anyway.” Who knew, he could even end up crossing paths with Sammy if the timing worked out.

 

“Yes Ma’am!”

 

“Oi cheeky! Can I just ask? You haven’t been speaking to Sammy Murray by any chance have you?” While she had been thinking about it Julie thought that she might as well say something.

 

“We might have exchanged the odd email or two…don’t say anything though. It really was what I wanted to do long before I’d spoken to him and found out he was applying too.”

 

“I don’t doubt that for a second love, I was just curious. You two always did get on well with each other.”

 

“Yeah, he’s a good mate. We still chat quite a bit online, when we can.” Anthony paused for a second, unsure of whether to say what he wanted to or not. “Gill’s really lovely too, you’re lucky to have found a best friend like her.”

 

“She has her plus points…”


	4. Chapter 4

Gill wandered into the kitchen, picked up a tea towel and started to help Iris with the drying up from lunch.

 

“Oh, you don’t have to do that love, you go and enjoy yourself. I bet you don’t get much time to relax back at home?” Gill carried on with her task anyway and smiled at her hostess.

 

“Honestly, it’s no trouble. Besides, I thought I’d give Julie and Anthony some space to talk.” Iris placed some items in the washing up bowl from the pile next to the sink and proceeded to wash them up now that there was room for them to drain.

 

“Ah, she told you then? I understand your Sammy also wants to join the family business?”

 

“Yeah, he’s already applied and just waiting for his training dates to come through.”

 

“Caroline’s none too happy about it. What about you?” Julie hadn’t mentioned anything about Gill’s feelings on the matter, only the fact that Sammy seemed fairly set on the idea.

 

“I wasn’t keen at first, I thought that perhaps his dad had put him up to it to make himself look good but when he articulated so passionately about why he wanted to join the force I couldn’t begrudge his choice. I worry for him but no more than any mother would.” It could have been worse, Sammy could have opted for a career in the army, or fire service or any number of other highly dangerous jobs.

 

“That sounds fair and reasonable to me. I hope Caroline comes round and supports Anthony like you do Sammy.”

 

“I’m sure she will, after all Julie’s a wonderful example to follow.” Gill was proud of Julie for having achieved the rank of DSI and she wasn’t even the slightest bit jealous. She had made her own choices, some hadn’t been the right ones but she had still managed to do well for herself and her career wasn’t anywhere near over yet.

 

“Ah well, that’s part of the problem.” Iris briefly wondered how much she should say to Gill but then thought that they must share everything with each other anyway.

 

“Oh?”

 

“She thinks Anthony will end up with the same kind of lifestyle as her and she can already see a lot of similarities between them. No disrespect to yourself or Julie but it’s not what Caroline had envisaged for her son.” Gill didn’t quite know how to respond, she didn’t want to interfere with Julie’s family’s private business but she wanted to defend both herself and Julie at the same time. Fortunately Iris was fairly astute and continued to talk before Gill could say anything in response.

 

“That’s just how Caroline feels my dear, it’s not what I think at all. I’m very proud of our Jules. She clearly loves her job, works hard and has been rewarded appropriately for her efforts. I’m also very glad that she found you. It was a long time in coming but it was probably worth it to meet the right person.” Gill blushed furiously; it was one thing saying that they would pretend to be a couple but it was another when she was directly faced with Iris’s gushing praise.

 

“It’s alright love, I know I’m not supposed to know and you’re probably not supposed to tell me but I am happy for you both, I can promise you that.” Gill felt an overwhelming urge to cry, Iris was so unbelievably sweet and kind it made her feel ever so slightly guilty for deceiving her.

 

“Now if only our Jules could see her way into making an honest woman of you I’d be tickled pink!” Gill couldn’t contain her laughter as she looked at Iris in shock. The two women held onto each other as they let the hysterics take them over.

 

* * *

 

“Julie…?” During their lull in conversation, Anthony had decided to take advantage of the fact that he had his aunt all to himself for a while and pressed ahead with something that had been on his mind for a while.

 

“Yes love?”

 

“While you’re here, can I tell you something in confidence?”

 

“Of course, you know you can tell me anything.” Anthony tried to find the words he’d been so frightened of saying aloud but he looked at Julie and felt that he should be able to speak to her of all people. Out of the corner of his eye he caught a glimpse of Gill heading towards them from inside the living room and thought better of telling Julie at that moment.

 

“Don’t worry, another time maybe.” He shook his head but hadn’t sounded disappointed, in fact if truth be told he was relieved as he realised that he wasn’t quite ready for that conversation just yet.

 

“You sure?”

 

“Yeah.” Julie had a very strong feeling she knew what Anthony had been about to say. To be honest it wouldn’t have been a surprise to anyone and if she knew her sister she probably already knew herself but was hoping that it would go away. Julie felt guilty that she hadn’t been a better role model by being open and honest about herself.

 

“You two finished? I came out here to join you.” Gill called out cheerily from the patio and walked up the length of garden to where they were standing by the shed.

 

“Oh no, we’ve only just warmed up!” Anthony encouraged her, grateful for the break in atmosphere and kicked the ball towards her. The three of them chased each other round the garden, although Gill was more keen on playing dirty and went in with some very dubious tackles to get the ball off Julie. She’d played with Sammy enough times not to be a novice and relished the opportunity to act like a big kid. Poor Anthony had no hope being stuck between those two and watched in delight as they fought for possession of the ball back and forth between them. Even Iris had stepped outside to watch from a distance, just in time to see Gill tackle Julie from in front of her and catch her foot instead of the ball. Gill ended up barrelling into the taller woman and the two of them came crashing down on the grass together. Julie was flat on her back with Gill on top facing her. For a moment they were both winded by the shock of the fall, but luckily neither of them were hurt in any way. Gill looked Julie square in the eye and felt the steady thudding of her friend’s racing heart against her own. She felt Julie’s warm breath on her face and was conscious that their lips were only millimetres away from touching. Time seemed to stand still around them until Anthony couldn’t hold back his laughter any longer and coughed and spluttered in glee. Julie grinned and playfully slapped Gill on the bum to encourage her to move.

 

“Get your bony backside off me, yer daft cow!” Gill wasn’t quite sure what made her do it but she bent her head to close the distance between them and planted a solid kiss to Julie’s lips before finally sliding off her. It hadn’t been a full on snog or romantic kiss, just a normal run of the mill familial kiss like the many they had shared before. Both Iris and Anthony chose not to interpret it that way but they kept their thoughts to themselves.

 

* * *

 

Gill lay on her side as she watched Julie’s back rise and fall in time with her breathing. She’d fallen asleep pretty much as soon as her head had hit the pillow. Unlike Gill who had been kept awake by her churning thoughts and feelings. She’d actually had a really lovely weekend with Julie and her family, particularly Iris and Anthony and it almost made her feel like she was a part of it. But at the end of the day she wasn’t was she? She hadn’t really kept in touch with Dave’s family, not that they had socialised much with them when they had been married. She occasionally heard from Dave’s mum but she didn’t have that easy, fun relationship that she did with Iris. Sammy had cousins of course but they were all old enough to keep in touch with each other of their own accord now. Sammy had more in common with Anthony than any of his real family and that seemed to have been enough for him. Julie let out a deep breath in her sleep and rolled over so that she was on her back but her head now faced Gill. She’d seen her friend actually relax and have fun this afternoon. She could see the striking similarities between her and Anthony and she had to admit that she could well imagine him as a police officer. Julie had told her the details of her discussion with her nephew on the drive back to the hotel and she’d admitted that he’d been speaking with Sammy about joining the force.

 

Despite being her best friend, Julie could be elusive with her emotions and it confused Gill when she tried to second guess what she was thinking. Julie was happy enough on her own but there were fleeting moments where she admitted that she had a certain dissatisfaction with life as a single person. She missed sharing experiences with someone and Gill was damn sure she needed love and affection like most other people. Her serious, professional persona aside, and whatever other barriers she liked to put in place to the outside world, Julie actually had a lot of love to give those around her. Anthony clearly worshipped the ground she walked on, not unlike her own son. Iris was very proud of her eldest daughter, whatever Julie thought and it was obvious Caroline loved her sister, even though they didn’t get on quite as well as Julie did with her brother Andrew. And then there was herself, her best friend, someone Julie had seemed to let in almost to the very core of her. Gill wondered if Julie would be prepared to go that final step and let her in all the way? Because after this weekend, Gill was absolutely certain that was what she wanted.

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

That evening Gill and Julie had really enjoyed their last few hours with the family as a group. Anthony had eventually been joined by his sisters, Caroline and Marc and they’d persuaded Iris to join in with a takeaway pizza. The girls had been keen to watch some reality talent program on the telly while Anthony and the adults went back to the board games and good conversation. Gill had listened carefully as Julie had been the buffer between Anthony and his parents as they debated his career plans all over again. Julie had done a brilliant job of defending both herself and her nephew but had considered her sister’s feelings at the same time. She could be quite a diplomat when she put her mind to it. Gill spent some time with Lucy and Claire once their attention had been diverted from that god-awful program and found that they really were very lovely. Claire was on the cusp of being ‘grungy’ and moody which would fit in with how Iris had described her ‘goth’ boyfriend. She had long dark hair which was dead straight and hung down over each shoulder. Lucy was extremely feminine with mid-length blonde hair that settled in gentle waves from a middle parting. She wore her make-up an inch thick and had an unhealthy obsession with shopping in designer clothes shops. Gill was quite relieved to have had a son, at least the only battles over clothes they’d had in the past were if he had been allowed the latest United strip each season.

 

Julie had dragged Gill into the garden with her packet of fags and a couple of bottles of beer sometime later. They’d sat on the warped wooden bench which looked like it was in great need of repainting and varnishing. They had leaned in close to each other as they’d gazed at the moon shining brightly down on them. No words had been needed and they’d simply enjoyed puffing away on their cigarettes and swigging mouthfuls of beer in silence.

 

“Thank you.” Julie had said sincerely out of the blue once their fags had been finished. There was no need to ask what for, Gill already knew, but it was nice for her best friend to have acknowledged it all the same.

 

“You’re most welcome.” Gill shuffled closer and nudged herself under Julie’s arm. Julie had taken the hint and lifted it up so Gill could wriggle into her side. She’d allowed her arm to rest on Gill’s stomach and they both relished in the comfort of the embrace until they had been disturbed by Caroline and her brood popping outside to say goodbye. If the tongues hadn’t been wagging about them before, they certainly were going to be after being caught wrapped up in each other’s arms on the bench!

* * *

 

Julie and Gill checked out of their hotel early the next morning so that they could enjoy a home cooked breakfast with Iris before setting off back to Manchester. Julie had risen fully refreshed and as bright and breezy as a daisy. She’d had a lovely weekend but she was keen to get back home, find out what she had missed and get back into her usual routine. Gill on the other hand had eventually fallen into a restless slumber and had woken up groggy and a bit down. She had also enjoyed the weekend but unlike Julie, she wasn’t really looking forward to going home. Of course she’d missed Sammy, not that she expected him to have missed her, but it had made a change to relax and spend some quality time alone with Julie. After the night she’d just had wrestling with her feelings for her best friend she was in a bit of a contemplative mood and some of the lighthearted fun from the weekend seemed to have disappeared.

 

“You’re quiet Gill.” Iris remarked as they tucked into the hefty spread in front of them. At least they wouldn’t have to worry about eating for the rest of the day after devouring this lot!

 

“Sorry, just didn’t sleep well last night, unlike some people who just rolled over and went out like a light!” Gill grinned at her best friend and took another mouthful of baked bean covered toast.

 

“I was tired!” Well that answered Iris’s unspoken question of if they’d been sharing a room at the hotel and added yet another layer of confirmation of their relationship. Gill had actually been grateful for Julie’s silence as she’d had too much on her mind to have been appropriately responsive. She’d relished watching Julie sleep peacefully, free from stress and worry, and the gentle reassurance of her breathing that had kept her company throughout the night.

* * *

 

Julie didn’t mind driving for long periods of time as much as Gill, so they’d used her car and she had offered to drive the entire journey there and back. She was a good driver, not too cautious but not reckless or speedy either. They were both happy to take their time on the journey home and had scheduled a service station stop off half way through just to break it up. Iris had gushed over them both as they’d said their goodbyes, requesting that they both visit again soon and that they looked after each other in the meantime. It had prompted some light discussion after they had left and they’d chatted idly for about twenty minutes or so before lapsing into a companionable silence. They were both obviously deep in thought reviewing the events of the weekend in their own heads as neither of them had thought to put the radio on. After a while Gill suddenly began talking again.

 

“Did I ever tell you that I once thought Sammy might be gay?” She’d been rehearsing in her head how she was going to approach the subjects she wanted to raise with Julie while she still had the chance.

 

“No?” Julie shook her head but allowed her friend to continue uninterrupted.

 

“He was about six, not that long after we met if I think about it. He had this best friend at Infants school. Alex his name was, very quiet, tiny, mixed race boy. They were inseparable. Sammy would talk about Alex incessantly at home and at school, well I’ve never seen two boys so affectionate with each other. They’d hold hands in the playground, cuddle each other, even kiss each other. A full on proper kiss on the lips. Their teacher got so concerned about it she called both me and Alex’s mother in to speak to us. Fortunately she felt the same way that I did; that it was a phase they’d grow out of and the more we made a fuss of it the more likely we were to upset the boys. It only lasted that particular school year, but I do remember sitting up in bed some nights thinking, what if? What if Sammy didn’t grow out of it and turned out to be gay when he was older? Not that I would have a problem if he was but I suddenly realised that his life would be that much harder and I didn’t want that for him. I didn’t want to have to see my sweet, little sensitive boy suffer through no fault of his own because of a quirk of nature. And he would have suffered because there are still some small minded, bigoted people out there. None more so than his own father I’m sad to say. It’s alright for a colleague but ‘not in my own back yard’ if you know what I mean? I still don’t know if Sammy really did grow out of it or if there’s a little part of him that’s a bit bisexual. Although I have spoken to him a few times about it, albeit in a roundabout way.”

 

“Why are you telling me this Gill?” While it was surprising as Julie had never considered Sammy to be anything other than straight, it wasn’t exactly the sort of news she was interested in. She was very fond of him and took an interest in his life but just because she was gay didn’t mean that she was interested in other people’s sexualities.

 

“Because mothers know their children, no matter how buried these things might be and no matter how old the child is. Perhaps you should give your mum a bit more credit and come out to her properly?” Not that Iris didn’t already know, smart woman that one, and you could see where Julie got some of her investigative skills from. Julie sighed, _not that old chestnut again_ , she thought to herself.

 

“There’s no reason to at the moment, it’s not like I’m seeing someone and keeping her in the dark about it. If that ever changes I probably would tell her, eventually.” That’s what she’d told herself all these years and she was sticking to it. Really she had just been afraid of her mother’s rejection, as most gay children are before they’ve come out to their parents, and she didn’t doubt that she would have been when she had been Sammy’s age. However, after Gill had told her that she had assumed they were in a relationship with each other she had to admit that she’d been watching her mother closely. She hadn’t treated Julie any differently to normal and everything had been light and easy between them. In fact, she’d probably go so far as to say that it had been the best visit back home she’d had in years. The only thing that would have made it better was if Andrew and his clan could have made it too.

 

“Good. At least think about it, you only have one mum after all.” Julie considered it was a strange thing for Gill to have said but she was well used to her odd train of thoughts by now. In their job you had to be able to think in a different way, well outside of the box, and then be able to come back to the original puzzle and fit it all together.

 

A short time later they arrived at their designated pit stop and pulled into the service station for a coffee.

 

“You know, I often wondered if it was my fault. Sammy being gay, or bisexual, if he was, or is.” They walked across the car park and Gill continued their conversation from earlier as though there hadn’t been a lengthy gap since then.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I didn’t really understand it myself at the time but I thought that perhaps I’d projected something onto him while I was pregnant or that he’d picked up on something within me.”

 

“You’re not making any sense.” Julie had stopped just outside the main entrance of the service station and patiently allowed Gill to explain.

 

“When I was fourteen there was this girl, Jessica Jones. She was tall and blonde and took me under her wing as I was the shortest in the year, painfully shy and not particularly strong when it came to sports. She was a champion at netball, hockey, athletics and just about every other sort of sport going. She wanted to protect me and I quite liked the idea of being protected at that time. She used to take me round the back of the PE block at lunchtime, kiss me and promise that she’d always look after me. At seventeen it was Susan Wright. She was a gawky, geeky teenager who dropped her school books in front of me on the first day of term at sixth form. Of course I immediately went to help her pick them up, our eyes met and there was just something there. We didn’t have a single class together but we were in the same tutor group. We danced around each other for ages, but I knew what I wanted from the very beginning. By the time I found the courage to make my move I was asked out by the head boy and immediately said yes. I still don’t know why I did that. Over the years I’ve understood that I had an appreciation for certain women in my life but it was never anything I had the opportunity or inclination to do anything about.”

 

“Why did you never tell me this before?” Julie was confused, she thought that they didn’t have any secrets between them. She’d trusted Gill with some of her most deeply personal thoughts and experiences, something she’d never felt comfortable sharing with anyone else in her life.

 

“I didn’t think it was relevant, hardly worth noting really. Not until my latent homosexuality came rampaging to the forefront of my mind and my heart.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“You, yer daft cow!” Julie looked at Gill in shock, she hadn’t been expecting that confession. “What if your mum was right? What if we’ve been in a relationship with each other for years, just not realised it? How many times have been been mistaken for a couple on holiday or when we’ve been out on the town together?”

 

“Other people’s perception of our relationship has got nothing to do with reality.” If Gill hadn’t had such a fixed idea of where she had been going with her confession she might just have picked up on Julie’s defensive tone.

 

“No, but maybe they just saw the obvious and what we’ve been trying to subconsciously deny?” Gill paused for moment and then it suddenly occurred to her that maybe Julie didn’t feel that way about her after all. Just because she was a lesbian didn’t mean that she had to fancy every woman that gave her the time of day. Perhaps Gill was the only one to confuse a genuine friendship with something more? Julie made no move to say anything in response and Gill felt a desperate need for a few moments to collect herself. “Can you get us a latte? I just need to pop to the ladies.”

 

“Sure.” Gill entered the service station and went down the corridor towards the toilets, locked herself in a cubicle and slumped back against the door. _What an idiot,_ she thought to herself. That was probably the clumsiest way of telling her best friend how she felt about her, not to mention the worst possible timing; they still had a couple of hours drive ahead of them. Tears gathered at the corner of her eyes and she quickly brushed them aside. It had taken a lot for her to admit what she felt to herself and then to find the courage to say it to Julie. She wondered if Julie would just pretend that nothing had happened or would she try and let her down gently with an ‘I’m flattered but..’?


	6. Chapter 6

Once Gill had sorted herself out she spotted Julie sitting at a table with two coffees beside her and she made her way over. She hoped that it didn’t look like she’d just been crying and that the crimson flush of embarrassment on her cheeks had died down somewhat.

 

“Thanks for getting that for me love.” Gill sat herself opposite her best friend and tried to act as normally as she could despite the nerves that were sending all sorts of confusing signals to her brain.

 

“Gill, about what you said…?” Julie began but on impulse Gill cut her off.

 

“Forget it, it was just a silly notion.” Gill thought that she would try to brush it off before Julie could start launching into a speech about how she didn’t feel that way about her and why it wouldn’t work anyway.

 

“Was it?” Before Gill could respond Julie continued and reached out across the table to lace their fingers together. “From the moment we first spoke I knew that there was something about you I really liked. I was absolutely smitten until lunchtime on the second day of that course when I finally noticed your wedding ring. I felt like an idiot for not checking sooner! By then I was already head over heels for you. After that I tried to keep my distance but you kept following me around for the rest of the week! I thought that might have been the last I would see of you but then you suddenly popped up in the middle of a case my syndicate was working on, forced me to listen to you with your National Crime Faculty hat on and helped to solve the bloody thing. You stood there, in the middle of my office and launched into one of your usual intuitive tangents, all talking with your hands and enthusiasm radiating from your bones. You ignited a spark within me that day and it turned into a raging bloody fire. I knew that I couldn’t let you go, even if we could only ever be friends. It was the best decision I have ever made in my life because your friendship has enriched me as a person, grounded me, given me a purpose and broken me out of my protective shell. But it was only ever going to be you, no one else could come even remotely close after that. I knew it was hopeless and that one day my heart would get ripped apart because of it but I couldn’t help how I felt about you. For you to tell me, after all this time, that by some miracle you could just possibly feel the same way…I can’t…I mean…I’m just…stunned.” Gill’s face was soaked with the tears that had come pouring down her cheeks during Julie’s heartfelt confession.

 

“You really feel like that about me?” At Julie’s nod Gill continued. “And you weren’t ever going to tell me?”

 

“How could I? It wouldn’t have been at all fair to you.” Julie shook her head sadly. It had hardly been fair to herself either but it wasn’t Gill’s fault that Julie had fallen for her.

 

“But you’d have never…?” _Met anyone else or resolved her feelings?_ Probably not.

 

“No and that was my problem not yours.”

 

“Where do we go from here?” Julie finally let go of Gill’s hand and drew attention to her rapidly cooling drink instead.

 

“I think we should drink our coffee before we do or say anything else!” Gill knew how much Julie hated a cold cup of coffee and coffee shops never made the posh ones hot enough to begin with. Gill grinned and wrapped her hands around her gigantic mug of frothed milk and espresso shots. How much caffeine did Julie think she needed anyway? They both took a couple of large gulps in companionable silence, each no doubt thinking over the revelations of the last few minutes.

 

“Does this feel as weird to you as it does to me? In a good way I mean.” Julie beamed and nodded.

 

“Yeah, it feels unreal, like at any moment I’m going to wake up from a dream.” Julie was trembling from head to toe in nervous excitement and her brain was working overtime trying to process it all. The coffee probably wasn’t going to help either of them in the long run.

 

They left the coffee shop hand in hand, both feeling like teenagers on a first date. When they got to the car they both seemed reluctant to get in. Gill reached up and planted a gentle kiss to Julie’s lips, almost shy, as though she wasn’t sure how welcome it would have been.

 

“You call that a kiss?” Julie teased Gill gently and pulled the smaller woman closer by her waist. She then proceeded to snog the life out of her best friend, slipping her tongue into Gill’s mouth and kissing her until they desperately needed to stop for air. They held each other close as they attempted to get their breath back. Gill’s hair was all over the place and her lips swollen and bruised from the kiss. Julie’s appearance hadn’t fared much better.

 

“Wow!” Gill panted out, still breathless and her brain fogged up by her raging hormones.

 

“Yeah.” Julie’s brain wasn’t much clearer and she wished she could have thought of something more eloquent to say. It was absurd, they’d known each other for so long and yet it was almost like they were seeing each other properly for the first time. “Come on, let’s go home.”

 

* * *

 

Julie pulled up on Gill’s driveway next to her car and put the handbrake on but didn’t stop the engine.

 

“So…this is it then? Back to the daily grind.” Julie glanced at Gill who looked deep in thought.

 

“Did you want to come in for a cup of tea or something?”

 

“No, I should really be getting back. If I do nothing else I’ve got to get some food in and do some washing.” Gill looked crestfallen but nodded her head in understanding. Fortunately Julie picked up on it. “What’s up?”

 

“I don’t want you to go home, I’m going to miss you.” It sounded a little petulant for a woman approaching fifty years of age but Gill didn’t care. She’d been overwhelmingly happy until they had been within a few short miles of Manchester when reality had suddenly hit her in the face. Julie smiled sadly.

 

“I know, me too but we both have to go to work tomorrow.”

 

“Can’t you stay? At least tonight?” Julie was fighting with herself knowing that she really should go home but she desperately wanted to stay with Gill and relish being able to be together, as a couple.

 

“Oh god! Did you know that you’re pouting? How can I possibly say no to you looking like that?” Gill grinned, leaned across the seats and planted a quick kiss to Julie’s lips. “I really do have to go home first though, at least make sure everything’s alright, pick up my post and some clothes for work.”

 

“Okay, but you’d better get back here as soon as you can! I’ll make us something to eat, if you’ve got any room after breakfast that is?” Julie chuckled.

 

“Mum does like to feed us up! I’m a bit peckish so yeah, that would be great. Nothing too heavy though.”

 

“Right, well I’ll see you in a bit then?” Julie nodded and Gill finally felt able to get out of the car. She leaned across the seats one more time to kiss Julie goodbye before lifting the boot and taking out her case.

 

* * *

 

Julie was as good as her word and came back a couple of hours later. She had unpacked her weekend case and repacked it with a couple of work shirts, a pair of slacks, her heels and other bits and bobs she needed for work in the morning. She'd picked up her post on the way in, fortunately nothing particularly interesting, and she decided to worry about food later. Gill greeted her friend, no _girlfriend_ , with a kiss and took her by the hand all the way through to the kitchen/dining room. She had made some sandwiches and a small salad for their tea, just enough to take the edge off any hunger pangs.

 

“Where’s Sammy tonight?”

 

“He’s staying with Orla at her parents house. He’s on a late shift tomorrow but she’s got a lecture first thing and it’s closer to the campus than here.” Julie digested the information as she chewed on her cheese and pickle sandwich. When Gill had asked her to stay the night she had assumed that she meant as a couple, in the same room and in all likelihood at some point have sex but she hadn’t been certain and they hadn’t discussed that side of things yet.

 

“Right, so we’re home alone then?” Julie thought she’d broach the subject discreetly first.

 

“Mmm hmm. I can’t think what we could possibly do to pass the time.” Gill raised her eyebrows at Julie and her voice had been heavily laden with suggestion.

 

“Gill…” Julie admonished the younger woman, knowing that they should really talk about it first. “Are you sure? Tonight?” They’d barely begun their relationship, hadn’t really even discussed what either of them had expected, wanted or needed without complicating their feelings by sleeping together so soon.

 

“Well, you can stand and watch if you’d like but after our kiss earlier I’m a bit horny so I need some sort of relief.” They both burst into laughter and went back to munching on their sandwiches.

 

* * *

 

Needless to say they hadn’t leapt on each other the moment they had finished their tea. Julie had helped Gill to clean up after themselves and made a pot of tea to take into the living room with them. Gill put a golden oldie radio station on as background music and they’d settled on the settee together and relished in the comfort of being with each other. Gill sat upright with her legs stretched out in front of her so that her feet rested on the coffee table. Julie had her head in Gill’s lap, her body lay along the length of the sofa and her feet rested on the arm at the other end. Gill had been idly playing with Julie’s hair while they had talked. She looked down at her girlfriend and smiled gently.

 

“I’m going to tell Sammy as soon as I get a chance to sit down with him.”

 

“You might want to give it a while before you do that. What if this doesn’t work out?” Gill raised her eyebrows doubtfully.

 

“We’ve known each other for so long we know exactly what we’re getting into. I know that you’re not a fan of sweet things apart from coffee, you sometimes talk in your sleep when you’re stressed, you can eat your dinner in a matter of seconds if you’re starving and you hate cleaning your football boots.” Julie chuckled and Gill felt the vibrations in her lap.

 

“Okay, fair enough but you know what I meant.”

 

“Are you worried about the sex? Because I tell ya lady I’ve not had any complaints before. Your equipment might be a bit different to what I’ve been used to but I reckon I could find my way around.” Julie actually guffawed out loud until her whole body shook with laughter.

 

“I can’t say that’s the most flattering thing anyone’s ever said to me. And no, I’m not worried about making love with you, I think we can more than manage on that front.” Julie reached up and cupped the back of Gill’s head so she could bring her face down and let their lips meet in a firm kiss. “You know when you want something so much but you don’t let yourself get too excited because sometimes the anticipation is more thrilling than actually getting it? Or when you do get it, you realise that it’s not quite what you thought it was going to be?”

 

“Charming!”

 

“Gill, I’m just trying to be realistic.”

 

“I understand what you’re saying Slap, I really do, but despite that dickweed of an ex-husband I have a lot of faith in you and us.” Gill actually sounded completely convinced in what she was saying.

 

“How do you think Sammy will take it?”

 

“I don’t know to be honest. Obviously given his own history and some of the friends he has, he wouldn’t be opposed to it in theory. But you know teenage boys and their mothers, probably doesn’t really want to think about me having a sex life of my own.” Julie chuckled but grew serious in the next breath.

 

“What about when he finds out that it’s me?”

 

“Oh god Slap, he adores you! I don’t think you have much to worry about on that front.”

 

“I just wouldn’t want him to think that I’ve let him down in some way.” The image of Anthony and what he had tried to tell her yesterday flashed in her mind and she couldn’t help but think that she _had_ let him down and he was her own flesh and blood. It was one of the reasons she had tried to keep herself from getting too close to people all these years.

 

“Why would he think that?”

 

“I’m supposed to be your friend, not take advantage of you.”

 

“You’re hardly doing that now are you? You’ve waited _how long_ to tell me how you feel?” Julie may be a formidable Detective Superintendent in her day job but when it came down to her relationships she was unrecognisable. “I know my son and he loves you. I somehow don’t think this will change that.”

 

Julie pulled herself up from her comfortable position on Gill’s lap and sat upright next to her. She was desperate to keep things on a less serious note, there would be time enough for those sorts of conversations later. She leaned in for a languid kiss, slipping a hand through her hair to hold her face steady. She pulled back slightly to catch Gill’s eye.

 

“So, I remember someone mentioned something about being horny?” Gill gave Julie a coy grin.

 

“I did indeed.”

 

“That’s jolly good then isn’t it? Because I think I’ve caught up with you and as much as I would love to watch I think this time around it would be better if I joined in.” Julie let her free hand drift to the hem of Gill’s top and slipped it inside. Gill seemed to hold her breath as Julie’s hand climbed slowly up the bare skin of her torso, all the way to her bra-clad breasts. They maintained eye contact as Julie caressed and teased Gill’s right breast and the younger woman pushed herself further into her lover’s hand in order to get more contact. Gill initiated another kiss and Julie began to play with Gill’s nipple through her bra. They moved together, kissing and caressing with increasing fervour. Hands and lips touched, arms and legs entwined, pushing and pulling as breaths came in shorter, faster, pants and moans. It had been a long time since Gill had been pushed into the corner of a sofa as a lover had snogged her senseless. Judging by Julie’s enthusiasm it had been a long time for her too. Somewhere along the way Julie had managed to get Gill’s top off and the top button of her jeans and the zip down. Julie’s clothing was still intact, much to Gill’s disappointment.

 

“Let’s take this upstairs.” Gill suggested to her partner in a brief moment between the heat and the passion.

 

“I thought you’d never ask!” Julie disengaged herself from Gill’s body, leapt off the settee and held her hand out to Gill.

 

“Well you’re certainly keen!” Gill grinned cheekily, took Julie’s proffered hand and stood up on shaky legs looking well and truly ravished. Her hair stuck up all over the place, her cheeks and lips sported a natural rosy hue and her jeans sat low on her waist ready to fall down. Julie couldn’t help but stare, she was already well versed in the beauty of her best friend but looking at her like this, so dishevelled and wanting and natural, made her hormones surge even more.

 

“You’re beautiful.” She said it with such reverence that Gill was quite taken aback. She looked down at herself and back up at Julie with a puzzled expression.

 

“Hardly, I’m a mess!” Julie shook her head and leaned in to kiss Gill softly.

 

“Exactly. I want you just like this. Not the perfectly coiffed, poised and put together Detective Chief Inspector. I want the messy, human and emotional Gill Murray who feels comfortable sharing herself with me.”

 

“You’re already halfway into my knickers lady, you can stop trying so hard.” It was said in jest but Gill understood exactly what Julie had meant. “I’d return the compliment but you’re wearing far too many clothes for me to possibly comment.”

 

“You’d better get up those stairs quick-smart and help me get out of them then hadn’t you?” Gill poked Julie in the ribs, gathered up the waistband of her jeans in her hands and made for the stairs with her lover in hot pursuit.


	7. Chapter 7

The entire length of Julie’s body spasmed in sync with her orgasm. From head to toe the hormones raced, her nerves tingled and the world was momentarily lost behind a cascade of fireworks in her mind’s eye. She felt as though she had stopped breathing for a few seconds; like the breath from her lungs had been ripped out of her and she’d forgotten how to breathe back in again. Finally the world slowly came back into focus; the cool sheet beneath her bare back, the warmth of the room, the continuing strokes of Gill’s fingers inside of her and her thumb on her clit which sent small aftershocks of pleasure back through her body. Amongst the thick fog of feelings and emotions she vaguely heard Gill’s gentle voice encouraging her to breathe. She tried to but her breaths came in quick, shallow pants which she couldn’t control. Gill guided her through sporadic deep draws to try and even it back out until she was breathing heavily but steadily once again. Julie threw an arm over her eyes and felt her whole body sink into the mattress, completely spent and incoherent of thought or speech. Gill extricated her fingers slowly and languidly kissed her way up her lover’s body. She peeled Julie’s arm away from her eyes and kissed her lips slowly. She settled herself half on top of the taller woman, one leg thrown over her hip to bring her closer, and snuggled into her side as she drew the duvet over them up to their waists. Julie suddenly turned into Gill’s embrace and buried her head into her chest. Gill knew that she was trying to compose herself, to stop the tears that threatened to overwhelm her from falling so obviously in a post-coital emotional mess. Gill had reassured her numerous times that it was perfectly fine to cry at any point in their love-making but somehow Julie still felt that it was something she wanted to try and hide. Gill kissed the top of her partner’s head and brushed back some of the strands of her grown out fringe from her sweaty brow. Eventually Julie loosened her grip on Gill and rolled back over so they could look each other in the eye. Gill ran a gentle hand over Julie’s cheek and brought their lips together for another kiss.

 

“Better?” Gill asked her lover teasingly.

 

“Mmm, much. You’re getting quite good at that you know.” Gill playfully swatted Julie’s shoulder.

 

“Only _quite_ good eh? Well you know what you can do if you’re not _entirely_ satisfied.” Julie chuckled and some of the intensity of their love-making had dissipated somewhat. Because Julie had carried her cards so close to her chest all these years the burning passion that had always bubbled away underneath the surface had been tempered unnaturally. Now that she was free to express what she felt, it regularly overwhelmed her and Gill had been surprised but more than willing to be the one to help her vent it. They pushed themselves further up the bed, pulled the covers up around them properly and snuggled down for a cuddle. It was two weeks before Christmas and Britain was in the middle of a cold snap, complete with snow, ice and freezing fog.

 

“So, how’s this bright idea of yours going to work again?” Julie continued the conversation they’d been having prior to things getting hot and heavy between them as they had attempted to put up some Christmas decorations.

 

“Well, I thought that your Mum, Caroline and Marc could stay here with us and the kids could stay at your place.” Gill’s reasoning being that ‘the kids’ were old enough to look after themselves by now and she thought they would appreciate not being under the watchful eye of their parents for a few days.

 

“But I’ve only got two bedrooms. I suppose there’s the living room?”

 

“I’m the sure kids could make do for a couple of days? The girls could stay here and have my living room if they preferred, at least it’s not as open as yours. Is Anthony definitely bringing Karl?” Julie took the time to place a soft kiss to Gill’s bare shoulder, relishing in their rare moment of peace and quiet together.

 

“It’s still a bit up in the air with his parents, they haven’t met Caroline or Marc yet. I’m due to phone mum tomorrow, so I’ll see what the situation is then.” Gill turned in their embrace and raised her eyebrows at Julie. “What?”

 

“You’ve actually scheduled a phone call with your mother? Wonders will never cease!” Julie gave the shoulder she’d just kissed a playful shove.

 

“Ha ha! We’ve got a lot of preparation to do before we’re ready for their arrival. Why did you rope us into doing this again?” Julie knew why and had actually needed very little persuading when Gill had first proposed hosting her family for Christmas. It would be their first one together as a couple and it was an ideal time to let go of her fears and secrets. There wasn’t going to be a big announcement or anything like that but just by the fact that they were now living together in Gill’s house and spending the occasion as a family unit they thought it would be a big enough statement. On top of that Anthony had just brought home his first boyfriend and he needed the support of those who already had some idea what it was like for him.

 

“You’re enjoying this really, I’ve never seen you so excited about Christmas!” Julie harrumphed at being caught out and decided to distract Gill in the most favourite of ways she knew how.

 

* * *

 

Needless to say, the atmospheric wintry weather disappeared a couple of days before Xmas eve and had left behind a mild and slightly damp atmosphere for the event itself. Fortunately for the Murray-Dodson household the weather was the last of their worries. Julie had dragged Sammy and Orla round the local Costco to stock up on food and drink for the few days they were entertaining. Trolley rage was already well and truly in force and theirs had been stolen twice halfway through filling it up! Julie had been ready to get out her police badge when it was found for the second time. Usually Sammy moaned and groaned something rotten when it came to the weekly shop but the whole thing had had him in hysterics. He came out on top though when Julie had bought them both a bottle of something alcoholic of their choice as a thank you for helping. Orla had even managed to wangle a box of chocolates but she was expecting to share them later on when they were all sat down with a cup of tea.

 

It turned out that Gill was quite house proud and she was a naturally born host, so she had stayed behind to put clean sheets on all the beds, set up the dining room for her guests, vacuumed, cleaned and dusted wherever she could. She then popped over to Julie’s house and set up the two rooms over there for the kids. Lucy and Claire had decided to make their own arrangements in the end, the lack of a proper bed had put Lucy off and Claire had wanted to stay with her boyfriend’s family instead. If her brother was allowed to have his boyfriend stay with him then she didn’t see why she wasn’t allowed to stay with hers. Caroline and Marc had given in easily, they’d been through a fair bit the last couple of months and were still finding it all difficult to deal with. It was pretty much anything for a quiet life these days and Gill’s offer to host the Christmas festivities had been a welcome one.

 

* * *

 

**Christmas Eve**

 

Gill opened the door to her guests and was swept up in a wave of hugs, kisses and seasonal good wishes. Sammy and Orla stood off to one side so Gill could introduce them to Julie’s family. Of course they had all met Sammy before, Iris and Anthony more than once, but all of them had yet to meet Orla. Anthony had spoken to her on Skype a few times but they’d never met in the flesh. Anthony and Sammy hugged tightly and shook hands with their respective partners. Julie’s nephew turned to Gill, shyly introduced Karl and then looked around for his aunt.

 

“Where’s Julie?”

 

“She’s just finishing a few things off in the kitchen love. Go on through if you like.” Sammy and Orla took their bags and coats and pointed them in the direction of the kitchen. Afterwards Gill instructed them to look after Caroline and Marc for her and they ushered the older adults into the living room. They set about being perfect hosts while Gill and Julie were otherwise occupied. Iris had been hovering at the back of the queue until everyone had had their turn. She wrapped Gill up in a motherly hug and kissed her cheek.

 

“Oh my Darling! Let me look at you.” Iris ran through her customary inspection of Gill and beamed at her in happiness. “This was such a wonderful idea. I’ve been looking forward to it for weeks.” Gill had grown just as excited as Julie as it had been the first Christmas family gathering she had hosted since Sammy was very small. Of course she was also quite nervous at how the merging of their two families was going to go down but they were prepared to get through it together.

 

“I’m glad you wanted to come. Mum’s joining us tomorrow but she’s not staying. She doesn’t live that far and she does like to keep to her routine.” Kathleen had been reluctant to join them as she was sceptical of her daughter’s new relationship but was also curious to see how it worked in practice.

 

“It will be lovely to meet her.” Gill just hoped the two of them would help each other to understand and diffuse any prejudices or concerns they had. After all, they were from a different generation and had been taught to fear anything that was different and unknown.

 

“Let me take your coat.” Iris shrugged herself out of the large winter coat with faux fur lined hood and cuffs and handed it to Gill to put it on the peg in the hallway. “Did you want me to show you to your room or shall I just take your bags up there for you?”

 

“I’d love a grand tour and drop them off on the way. If it’s not too much trouble?” Iris was nothing if not nosey and had been itching to see inside Gill’s rather large detached house since they’d pulled up outside. Julie lived in a much more modest semi-detached which was situated closer to central Manchester but she had invested a lot of time and money to make it modern inside.

 

“Of course not.” Gill took Iris upstairs first, she wanted to give Julie as much time alone with Anthony and Karl as she could before they were swept up in the festivities. Her bedroom was the first room to the left on the long landing and despite having talked about it with Julie, Gill was momentarily shy about how to address the elephant in the room. The door was open so Gill decided to just go for it and tell the truth. She ushered Iris just inside so she could take in the decor. “This is our room.” Iris had a good old look around from where she stood and smiled brightly.

 

“It’s lovely.” Iris noted that it was surprisingly feminine, not pink and fluffy, but a gentle lavender colour and most definitely a room where two women slept. She wondered if it was all Gill’s idea because Julie had certainly never had a bedroom quite like it. She took in the little things that she recognised as Julie’s, like her watch on the bedside cabinet and a couple of pairs of her brightly coloured heels by the wardrobe. She also noticed some of the things that were clearly Gill’s, the baby photo of Sammy by the dressing table and a freshly ironed skirt that hung from a hanger over the wardrobe door.

 

“Thank you, I think so. Right, next door is the guest room, yours for the next few days.” Gill led Iris further along the landing to the last room on the left hand side. It was a lovely emerald green colour with the bedspread to match. It was simple and clean with a laminate floor and a small green rug by one side of the double bed. “You’ve got a street view I’m afraid but it’s very quiet round here so I’m sure you won’t be disturbed.”

 

“Oh I don’t mind at all dear.” Gill put the older woman’s bags down on the floor beside the bed.

 

“Did you want a few minutes to unpack? The chest of drawers to the right are completely empty, so please feel free to use them.” Orla tended to spread her things into the guest room if she was planning on staying for more than a couple of days but she’d made alternative arrangements this time around.

 

“I’ll do it later but thank you for making the space for me.”

 

“It’s no problem at all. I’ll show you the rest of upstairs and then we’ll get us both a nice cup of tea.” Caroline and Marc would probably have ploughed their way through what had been left out for them in the living room by the time both she and Julie were finished with the rest of the Dodson clan.

 

“Now that sounds like a good idea!” Gill ushered Iris out of the room and showed her into the room immediately opposite.

 

“This is normally Sammy’s room but I’m putting Caroline and Marc here for the next few days.”

 

“It’s so nice of him to give up his room for us.” Iris had already been struck by how much of a lovely, polite boy Sammy was when she had first met him all those years ago and now he had matured without losing any of his manners.

 

“Oh it’s no trouble, he wanted some time to catch up with Anthony and for Orla and Karl to get to know each other as well.”

 

“Do you think they’ll get along together?”

 

“I’m sure they will, they’ve talked over Skype often enough. I can’t get either of them off it these days, especially now that both Sammy and Anthony are going through their training. Right, this is the bathroom. Julie and I have an en suite so it’s just between Caroline, Marc and yourself. Feel free to leave your toothbrush and anything else you want in here.” Gill mentally noted that it was the second time she had mentioned that she and Julie shared the same bedroom. She hoped that Julie would finally openly acknowledge their relationship to Iris during her stay so that they were completely clear on exactly what the situation was.

 

“You really are very kind to offer to put us up, or should I say put up _with_ us this year.” They both chuckled on the landing amongst the walnut decor and bold canvas prints.

 

“Honestly, it’s no imposition. It’s nice to have the company and entertain for a change.” For once _The Job_ wasn’t the main focus of their lives, at least for a few days and Gill found that she had been able to let go of it far more easily than she had anticipated. Of course, they would be back into the fray long before New Year’s eve, no doubt dealing with the fallout from the festive season but there was enough to keep them occupied before then.


	8. Chapter 8

**Meanwhile…**

 

Julie had been putting the final touches to the Christmas cake she had made entirely from scratch when her family had arrived. She wasn’t quite as domestic as Gill, but cakes were a particular speciality of hers. She not only baked well but was known to be quite artistic when it came to the decoration and presentation of food. She had just finished rolling out the icing to put on top of the marzipan layer when Anthony walked in.

 

“Hi Aunty Jules!” The youngster tried to come across bright and breezy despite how nervous he felt. Julie had been told about Karl in an email a few weeks ago, which she had promptly followed up with a tearful phone call. The tears had been from them both and they had spent nearly two hours talking about all the things they should have spoken about before. Julie turned and smiled at him and his guest kindly.

 

“Hiya love! Just give me one sec to finish this and I’ll be right with you.” She hated to appear rude but if she left the icing it would have dried out by the time she returned to it and she would be unable to mould it to the cake. Both Anthony and Karl watched in fascination as she smoothed the plain white icing over the top of the marzipan and down the sides of the cake, taking care to ensure there were no cracks, air bubbles or folds. She was meticulous and clearly had great pride in her work. She trimmed the edges with a pleated cutter to leave a pattern and dusted her hands off on a tea towel. She turned to her visitors, grinned and went to give her nephew a hug.

 

“So you made it down here okay then?” Anthony returned the hug and nodded.

 

“Yeah, it wasn’t too bad in the end. Hit a bit of traffic on the A1(M) but it was to be expected. I’m glad the snow has all gone now though, I didn’t fancy driving all this way in those conditions.” There was a short pause before Anthony eagerly went to make his introductions. “Julie, this is Karl. Karl, this is Julie.” Julie reached out and shook the dark skinned boy’s hand.

 

“Very pleased to meet you Karl, I’ve heard a lot about you.” Julie thought that he was rather cute, in a not-quite-grown-up-yet sort of way. He was twenty but had a round, boyish face with a button nose and the most gorgeous chocolate brown eyes. He was clean-shaven and had a short, neat afro. No wonder Anthony had fallen for him!

 

“Thanks, you too. You’re the police officer aren’t you?” Of course Anthony had regaled his boyfriend with tales of the aunt who had inspired him in his choice of career.

“One of two in the family now yeah.” Julie nudged Anthony’s shoulder with her own.

 

“Four if you count Gill and Sammy.” Julie smiled gratefully at her nephew for acknowledging her relationship with Gill in such an understated way but one that meant so much to her. She hadn’t thought of it quite like that and suddenly realised how much of a family business the police force had become.

 

“You two are so lucky; I wish I could have my time all over again, be open about things from the very beginning. I’m sorry that I wasn’t a better example to you.”

 

“You’ve already apologised and I’ve already told you there’s no need. Things were different for you, I understand that. Besides, I already knew deep down. I think I gravitated towards you because I recognised that difference in both of us.”

 

“You’re probably right. Anyway, enough maudlin talk and let’s enjoy Christmas. Do either of you want to crack open a bottle of something alcoholic?”

 

* * *

 

The whole clan sat down to a light dinner together before the kids had decided to head over to Julie’s house for the night. Sammy, Orla, Anthony and Karl were getting on like a house on fire and it was really lovely for both Gill and Julie to see. Of course Sammy and Anthony had been friends for years anyway but it looked like their friendship would continue well into adulthood as they broke away from their initial familial connection and embarked on lives of their own. The adults settled in the living room for a while as they chatted over tea and coffee. Caroline and Marc had seemed quiet and marginally uncomfortable since they had arrived. Julie decided that it wasn’t going to be her problem and if Caroline had something to say she’d wait for her to say it. Julie sat at one end of a settee with a cup of coffee in her hands. Gill had kicked off her shoes and curled her legs up under herself as she sat right next to Julie. Iris had the armchair perpendicular to Julie’s end of the settee and Caroline and Marc had the settee opposite Gill and Julie. They had just finished a discussion about the timings and plans for the day ahead and when Gill’s mum Kathleen was due to arrive. Sammy had offered to pick her up and drop her off as he would be driving the rest of the teenagers anyway. Gill decided that she’d had enough and made an announcement that she was going up to bed. She still had Julie’s present to wrap up and her card to write before she could give it to her in the morning. Caroline and Marc got up from their settee and said that they were also going up to bed. There was a round of verbal ‘good nights’ and Julie caught Gill’s hand before she left.

 

“I won’t be much longer myself love.” Gill nodded and and Julie knew that her silent message of ‘wait up for me’ had been received. It left mother and daughter alone for the first time in ages. “D’yer want another cuppa? There’s just about enough left in the pot.”

 

“Yes please love.” Julie poured her mum her drink and added a splash of milk. Julie finished off what was left in the percolator herself. “I…” Iris went to say something but somehow the words got stuck in her throat. She had so much that she wanted to say to her daughter but it all just felt like a jumble of platitudes that were thirty years too late in coming. “You…” She tried again but despite the words in her head they weren’t coming out of her mouth. She smiled at Julie who, despite what Gill sometimes thought, couldn’t read minds and just looked confused.

 

“Are you alright Mum?” Iris nodded and a couple of tears escaped from her eyes. “You’re not are you? What’s wrong?” Julie reached out and put a comforting hand on her arm.

 

“I’m sorry. I…” Iris took a deep breath to calm herself and continued. “You and Gill, you both seem very happy.” Julie held her mum’s gaze and smiled knowing that she could only be completely honest with her now.

 

“Thank you, we are.” Julie’s acknowledgement seemed to be what Iris needed to be able to collect her thoughts properly.

 

“I’m sorry that I’ve never said anything before, about you being, you know…” Julie smiled kindly and squeezed her mum’s hand in support.

 

“You’re allowed to say it Mum. Yes, I am gay but it doesn’t change anything. I’m still a police officer and work ridiculously long hours. I still live in Manchester and have friends like anyone else. And I still love my family, even my daft, soppy mother!” They gave each other a watery smile and kept hold of each other’s hands.

 

“And that includes Gill and Sammy now?”

 

“Yes it does. I’ve waited a long time for this, Gill too if truth be told. She deserves some happiness and security after what she went through with Dave.”

 

“You also deserve to be happy Jules, don’t forget that. That’s all I ever wanted for you. It was different back then, when you were a teenager I mean.” Iris hoped that it was the apology Julie had been looking for.

 

“Mum, you don’t have to explain, I understand. I could have spoken to you about it too, I just thought it would be easier to avoid it.”

 

“Did you think… Did you think that I would disown you?” Iris felt a pang in her heart that her daughter could have ever thought that she wouldn’t love her.

 

“We didn’t talk about it for so long that I didn’t really know what to think. But yeah, I thought you might not be too happy with the news.”

 

“I can’t honestly say one way or the other love, especially in those early days and for that I am so very sorry. But please believe me when I say that it doesn’t make any difference to me now.”

 

“I know and that’s all in the past, what matters is that you’re here and we’re spending Christmas together as a family. And that we have a chance to make sure Anthony feels accepted and comfortable being himself.” Julie might feel extraordinarily guilty for not being honest with her family sooner and inadvertently causing her nephew more heartache over his sexuality than was necessary but she could stand up, be counted and support him now.

 

“Did you know? Before he told us about Karl?”

 

“I think it’s fair to say that we all thought he might be gay. I’m sure he was going to talk to me about it when I came up to see you that last time, but we were interrupted and he thought better of it. I feel like I’ve let him down, that I should have been a better role model for him by being honest and open about myself a long time ago.”

 

“You weren’t to know love and you have been a wonderful role model for him. You always had a special bond; you’re so similar and now he’s going to be a police officer just like you.” A moment when Julie should be feeling proud of that fact was overshadowed by the knowledge that her sister was quite obviously far from happy with her son’s career choice.

 

“Anthony told me that Caroline and Marc are finding it all very difficult to deal with. Has she spoken to you about it at all?” Iris shook her head.

 

“You know your sister, she likes to bury her head in the sand. Perhaps you’ll have a chance to talk to her over the next couple of days?”

 

“I doubt it, we’ve never really spoken about anything personal before but you never know.” Julie sighed deeply and fidgeted on the settee. “I’d love to stay and talk some more but we’ve got a long day ahead of us tomorrow.”

 

“Of course love, I’m pretty tired myself.”

 

“Let me just get rid of this lot and I’ll see you upstairs to your room.” Julie gathered up the empty cups and put them on the tray along with the spoons and jug of milk.

 

“You can’t manage all that by yourself, let me help.” Iris took the teapot and percolator and followed Julie into the kitchen. She spotted the finished Christmas cake standing on the worktop. “Jules, this is beautiful! Did you do this?” It had been mentioned a couple of times during the evening that Julie had made the Christmas cake but nothing much had been made of it.

 

“Yeah, it looks alright doesn’t it? It tastes nice too.” Julie had made a smaller version with the same cake mixture which she, Gill, Sammy and Orla had demolished a few days ago.

 

“I didn’t know you could make something like this, it looks so professional!” Julie blushed under her mother’s gushing praise.

 

“I don’t make a habit of it but on special occasions I like to do my bit.”

 

“I really am very proud of you.” Iris pressed a kiss to her eldest daughter’s forehead.

 

“Thanks Mum, you’re not so bad yourself.” They hugged tightly and finally made their way upstairs. They hugged again at the door of the bedroom Julie shared with Gill and said their good nights.

 

* * *

 

Julie had been longer than she had anticipated and slipped into her room quietly just in case Gill had fallen asleep. The main light was off but the beside lamp on Julie’s side had been left on for her. Gill was curled up and lightly dozing with her body on her side of the bed and her legs across Julie’s side. Julie undressed quickly and slipped into bed beside Gill. She scooped her up in a tight hug and felt Gill turn and settle into it.

 

“You were a while?” Gill’s voice was thick with tiredness.

 

“Mum decided it was a good time to talk.” Julie whispered in an attempt to keep her girlfriend in her sleepy state.

 

“And was it?”

 

“Yeah, we’re okay.”

 

“Good. It was about time.”

 

“Let’s go to sleep, we can talk in the morning.” Gill looked up at Julie with sleepy eyes and pouted.

 

“I was hoping to unwrap my Christmas present early.” The suggestion in her voice was overshadowed by her evident tiredness, despite the fact that one of her hands had started to fondle one of Julie’s bare breasts.

 

“Sleep first and you might still get your wish.” Gill grinned sleepily and settled back down again.

 

“Night Slap. Love you.”

 

“I love you too. Goodnight.”


End file.
